Sex is perfectly natural, but it’s NOT naturally perfect. So, if you’re desperately in need to spice up your sex life, the following is intended to YOU.
One of the secrets to have a hot, spicy, long-lasting happy sex life is to talk over about everything with your partner. Some couples can’t just do this because they think that talking to each other about sex is absolutely DDD: Dirty, Dangerous and Denigrating. This fear of sex talk is what badly affects sex life. If you want to overcome this fear, here are four tips to teach you how to talk to your partner about your sex life.
1. Tell your husband that you like him
Flirting with your partner is important. You will feel comfortable with the conversation, as well as your partner will, if you say for example: “I like the way you shave your beard baby. You look sexy!” or “You look hot in this tight shirt honey. You turn me on!”. You can make the conversation more challenging and say “I like playing with your chest hairs. This is my favorite part!”
2. Praise your husband
Telling your husband what you find him good at is as important as flirting with him. You may say for example: “You were so good when we had sex last night. That was amazing!” You can go into details by saying “I like it whenever you kiss my neck..I can’t forget those soft /mad kisses.” (describe the way your husband kisses you), or “I like it when you run your fingers through my hair, you make me feel so comfortable.”
3. Talk about your thoughts with your husband
Have no fear to speak up your mind dear woman! Silence that fear inside you to turn your thoughts into words and just TALK. However, you have to make sure to choose the right words. For instance, instead of blaming your husband and saying: “Why do you neglect playing with my tummy when we have sex?”, you can just say: “You are great in bed darling, but I’d like that you spend more time playing with my tummy. You have no idea how much it feels awesome when you play with it.”
But if you don’t want to sound demanding, you can try this: “I had a great fantasy while I was bathing. I imagined that you were kissing me madly all over my body.” Be sure that hearing this will automatically make your husband willing to make your day-dream come true!
4. Ask your husband for sharing his thoughts with you
Maybe talking about sex is a hard task because your husband is a shy person. Encouraging your husband to talk is your duty then. But first, know your husband! Some men find it more comfortable to talk about intimate subjects in a low voice. So don’t act like a deaf woman and ask him to repeat what he said – just because you enjoy hearing it over and over- as this may embarrass him and discourage him to talk. Instead, try to make him feel at ease by leaning towards him, lending him you ear, and finish your conversation in whispers. Trust this! This usually leads to physical intimacy!
Whispers can help your husband share thoughts with you, and so are question tags. You may say for example: “you like it when I spread my hair on my shoulders, don’t you?” or “you don’t like it when I put on black underwear, do you?” Saying this means that you expect your husband to answer and share his thoughts. Notice that you did it cleverly! You made the job easy for your husband! Now, he’s going to share his thoughts comfortably without taking the burden to find the suitable and the safer way to tell you to change your underwear that he hates.
We’ve been taught at school, in every science lesson, to start with the theory then move to the practice. Knowing how to talk to your husband about sex can be “the theory” which leads to “the practice”: having a good happy sex life with your husband.